Sunday, December 16, 2007

Party Tip

Are you planning to attend a holiday party next weekend? Maybe it will be a boring suburban party where everyone will talk about how gifted their kids are. Maybe it will be an awkward "we are here with a group of people who all seem to be best friends and have no interest in talking to us" party. Maybe it will be an actual spectacular party with funny and smart friends. It doesn't matter, because I know something you can bring that will make the boring and awkward parties fun and the fun parties even better:


That's right. JELLO SHOTS. You walk in the door with some red and green jello shots and people will think you are one cool mother-f-er. You are The One Who Brought the Jello Shots. You brought the drink (jiggly substance) that makes people feel young, that makes people cheer and laugh, that makes people LOOSEN UP. There's no downside to jello shots.* In fact, when someone (ahem) starts blasting Kanye at 11pm, people who are in their late 30s and have never heard of Kanye will lose their minds with happiness. They will laugh and laugh and dance in awesome ways that only the drunk can manage. And when you go home that night with a smile on your face, you will say to your date "now that was a fun party."


*Unless you are: the designated driver, a recovering alcoholic, at an office party, at a childrens' party, with your parents or grandparents, on-call at the hospital, allergic to jello and/or vokda, underage, flying the airplane later that night, feeling like you might have a stomach bug, etc.


THE BASIC JELLO SHOT RECIPE

Ingredients:

1 small box (3 oz. package) of jello – any flavor

1 cup of boiling water

1 cup of vodka, chilled

Small paper or plastic cups

Place jello mix into a bowl or pitcher; make sure it can withstand boiling water. Add boiling water, and stir well until the jello is dissolved. Allow it to cool for a few minutes. Add the vodka and stir. Pour into small cups. Place the cups on a tray in the refrigerator, chill for several hours.

Tips:
1) I know that in college, people made these with Everclear. If you even have Everclear in your bar, then you are probably crazy and/or in college. Don't use Everclear for God's sake.
2) Put the jello shots in Dixie cups and guests can tear and slurp. For a higher class of jello shot, use the 1 oz plastic shot glasses they sell at Party America. In this case, you will need toothpicks so that people can go around the edges and release the jello.

3) If you aren't sure your host will be thrilled with jello shots, call her to ask if you may bring them. If she doesn't say "hell yeah!" then you may want to come down with a nasty cold.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

yep, you're brilliant. I'm thinking that my gran might like some of these on Christmas Day.

mamacita said...

You are an undisputed genius. And you are totally invited to all of my parties from this day forward.

christie said...

Next time, try these...www.suckandblow.com

Brilliant Asylum said...

This might be the last desperate act I take to save my office Christmas party in 4 dreaded days. I swear, the women in my place of business make Angela on "The Office" look like Holly Golightly by comparison. Brutal!!!

i suwannee said...

oh, i did that very thing this weekend!

busted the jello shots out of nowhere, and bam = drunk people = more fun.

every 30 minutes or so, just cycle back 'round with them. ball game.

Pigtown*Design said...

OMG! We did that one new years, but someone had cut "happy new year!" in jello/vodka. She kept the circles from the letters and there exisits a photo somewhere of us with red jello circles stuck on our noses and foreheads.

Decorno said...

This made me laugh my ass off.

SGM said...

Thank you, but I can't take all of the credit. It's my friend Kelly's move and I just copy it. Know what her husband brings? Grilled jalapenos stuffed with cream cheese and wrapped in bacon. It's all so brilliant, I could just die.
Those suck and blows look SCARY. Have you tried them Christie?
BA, make phony jello shots by leaving out the vodka but don't tell anyone. Then just start downing a bunch and watch the Angelas flip out!
Meg, way to take it to the next level!

anntorian said...

what a wonderful idea, i went out and bought plastic 1 oz. "look and feel like glass" cups last night. this year we are setting up a bar on my credenza and storing these babies in a mini fridge behind it. keeping the kitchen clear. thanks again, i only thought of jello cups in solo cups. oh college.