What's up, sluts?

Part 1 of the Real Housewives of New York City reunion show is TONIGHT (10 pm EST). Get ready for an hour full of indignation, smirks and boo-hooing.

Here's a clip of Kelly giving a rambling and contradictory account of her assault charge (subscribers click through):



My favorite part is Kelly's petulant "I don't want a tissue." I so wish the production assistant would have yelled from offstage "FUCK YOU, you orange buffoon!"

Are you getting bored with all of the stupid crap that comes out of Kelly's mouth? There's just such an endless supply! Here's an excerpt from her recent interview with People:

Bensimon says joining the already-established cast in the show’s second season was like diving into a “shark tank,” and blames her nerves for causing her to act like someone she’s not. “I was so guarded, I came across as not being me,” she said. “Everyone I know was like, ‘That’s not you! That’s the not the fun Kelly who’s always on Kelly time!’ I didn’t know these women. I was treading in murky waters and I didn’t know how to navigate.”

Kelly time? Is that like Hammer time?

Since filming ended, Bensimon hasn’t spent much time with any of the New York Housewives — “We don’t run in the same social circles,” she says — but she doesn’t harbor any ill will towards any of them, including Bethenny.

“I’m the first person to say [Bethenny's] a great girl,” says Bensimon. “To be her age in New York [and] single is not easy. But she’s doing a great job enjoying her life.”

Clearly there's no ill will! Jesus. What a patronizing, pot/kettle/black, dictionary-less ASSHOLE.


Don't forget the Real Housewives of New Jersey premiering after the NYC reunion. I'd like to think that in this scene, Caroline has just reached over the table and given someone a meaty slap that left an imprint of her ring.

I CAN'T WAIT!