Tuesday, May 20, 2008

"Won't you back that ass up?"

That quote is from me, talking about Greg Plitt's hiney. HOLY SMOKES, y'all. He was in his underwear! Wet underwear! There are no photos of this on Bravo's website. Take a moment to visualize. Not too shabby.

This is what happened on Work Out this week.

1. All of the trainers except Jackie get wasted at boot camp. Renessa and Greg Plitt get particularly smashed and as Erica put it, Renessa gets "t-boned" by Greg. I like that term! Crude, yet descriptive.

Greg does not show up at the 5am workout because he is "hung over" which I think is code for "recovering from t-boning Renessa." Renessa does show up, wearing Greg's sweatshirt, natch. This kind of behavior is not unheard of at Sky Sport, as Jesse points out. If Jackie's own actions are any indicator, lots of drinking and hooking up with co-workers/employees is company policy, but apparently there is a boot camp exception and Jackie bitches out Renessa for still being drunk. Note to Jackie: I don't know much about employment law, but I really think that the boot camp exception should be spelled out in the employee handbook in order to avoid confusion. I could write it up if you like. Let me know.

2. Just so you know, I felt intense hatred toward Evil Lisa for gawking at Greg and Renessa getting it on in the hot tub. Also, when everyone was at the bar drinking, Lisa pulled down her tank top and showed everyone her cleavage, joyfully exclaiming "they're real!" What's up with Lisa and tits? SHUT UP!

3. Greg Plitt doesn't see Jackie again until he meets up with her at Sky Sport. I'm not sure how this happened because they all rode up to boot camp on a bus together. How did he get back to LA without seeing her? Maybe he rode Renessa home? (oooooh, bad joke) Anyhow. He walks into Sky Sport, totally happy, not a care in the world. Jackie's all ready to throw down with him and scare his tight firm glutes but she quickly realizes that he doesn't give a damn about possibly being fired. So what does she do? She surrenders to the charm of Greg Plitt and is putty in his Adonis hands. He is off the hook with nary a harsh word and we witness yet another example of Jackie's completely arbitrary treatment of her employees.

4. Next is a super cringe-y part. We find out that not only did Peeler get fired, but his wife (totally forgot he was married!) dumped his ass soon after. He shows up at the Doug Blasdell Foundation auction thingy and proceeds to get hammered in grand style. Here he is getting jiggy with Gregg Not Plitt:

I don't actually remember this part, maybe because I was staring into my lap because I knew something embarrassing was going to happen. Cue the live auction! Peeler doesn't think an item has been bid high enough so he jumps up onto the stage and adds a week of free training to sweeten the pot.

Instead of people clamoring to bid more, there is silence. No further bidding. Cut to Jackie with a smug smile on her face and everyone wants to slap her. Oops. Maybe that's just me. But I doubt it.

End result: Peeler is humiliated in front of a roomful of people. How much more can one man take? We're about to see.

Peeler, even more drunk, pulls Jackie aside and tells her HE LOVES HER and that he wants to be her business partner (I think this was the gist, it was a little garbled). This is agony to watch. I would rather look at Alex McCord's nude photos* than view this again. Jackie tells him he's buzzed, not thinking straight and that she will never ever ever ever ever work with him again blah blah blah. Peeler completely blows up and runs off into the night.

The End.


For those of you who have cable, Jackie's new Work Out video is free On Demand. Rebecca, Renessa, Jesse and Agostina are Jackie's supporting cast if anyone's interested. There are two huge posters of the Jack(ass) on the wall and the video is kind of sexed up (surprise).

See you next week when Jackie's mom hides in her room playing with a cat rather than come out to meet Jackie's new girlfriend and her family.

*I was going to link to them but they are GONE. Looks like someone hired an attorney and is trying to clean up her image.


Anonymous said...

Peeler myspace bulletin:

Look I know it wasn't the right thing to get drunk at Doug's fundraiser. I wish I wouldn't but I did and I can't go back. I have never felt the hurt that I have felt that night in my entire life. I was dying inside and I couldn't stop the pain. Greg Piltt had told me that Jackie had talked to him earlier that day and said she wanted to hire me back and say she was sorry. So when I pulled her outside I thought she was going to say she was sorry for the things she had said about Jamie and I. But no she didn't this was the only reason I was saying I love you because I thought she had grown as a woman and decided she was going to say she was sorry. Boy was I wrong and once I knew she was going to try to flip the script I was going all in. I laid all my cards out on the line. I told her exactly what everyone has been wanting to say to her for a long time. She treats people like they are her toys and she only uses them when is for her own good. Look I am not perfect nor will I ever be and I am sorry I made a fool out of myself. You guys have to understand I just lost my Wife and I am at a fundraiser for Doug and then I felt all alone from the group because they really didn't know what went on with Jackie and I and they kinda thought I was an out cast and taking things to far. I have grown stronger and learned from my mistakes. I know now that drinking does not cure the pain in your heart it only makes it hurt worst. I wish I was sober that night so I could have really said everything I wanted to say. I got out a lot at the end but I had so much more to say. Maybe some day you will understand how and why I did what I did and know I am a good person. I am ashamed of what I did on stage but all I ever meant to do was help my buddies cause and help raise more money. All I wound up doing was making myself look like a fool. Well I just want you guys to know it has been a fun ride on this journey and I wouldn't change a thing. I hope you guys still support me and I will miss my tues night s coming on at 10.

Sarah's Fab Day said...

Uggghhh...mortifying. I hate to admit it but I get so embarrased by situtions on tv, real or not. So good think I didn't watch it. I would have died!

Paloma said...

I totally thought of you as I watched last night. :) I cringed through the whole Peeler part. Poor guy.

SGM said...

Oh Anon, thank you.

PEELER, I am clutching my hand to my heart right now! I love you, honey. Your gym will be a huge success. Don't drink anymore though.

kelly said...

i love this blog. thank you for making us all so happy. :)

poor brian peeler. i want him to be a huge success. btw, love how you phrased "Jack(ass)". very clever!

zakary said...

I missed the last part with Peeler (damn baby), but that is totally embarrasing. I feel sorry for him, I really like him. He has not had the best year ever.

Jackie irritates me to no end. But, she could kick my ass, so we will just leave it at that.

Kelly said...

omg, peeler is married?! i had no idea. i love your recaps...i missed last night and can't wait to watch it tonight!!!

karey m. said...

pain. ful.

{it's like i watched it! you're soooo goooood.}

J said...

SO...I'm new here. Where can I watch this at? I am totally lost!!

I *Heart* You said...

ok- i finally watched it last night and i have to say that i had to leave them room when peeler jumped onstage. i had already read your recap and i just couldn't watch. that poor poor bastard!!

Oh- and did you see rebecca's eyes when peeler came up behind her and put his head on her head? it was freakin hilarious!

also- g plitt became pretty unattractive to me this episode. he KNOWS how hot he is and that is a turn off. when he got on top of renessa on the bar to take that picture i was mortified for the both of them. thank god erica had the good sense to not go there and get "t-boned" by the plitt. he is pretty much a douche.

as always, SGM, love love love your recap!

Jennifer said...

For the record, I totally would have bid on that package of five training sessions with him.

SGM said...

J, it's on Bravo, Tuesday nights. Check your local listings. :)

Paige, I did see Rebecca's eyes. And did you see PEELER'S eyes while he was hugging Rebecca? Half mast, like dreamy-happy, like "I love Rebecca." DRUNK. Strangely, Plitt became more attractive to me after this episode. He is a douche, but I don't know...he just seemed more likable.

Jennifer, ME TOO. Have you seen those episodes where he calls himself Michelangelo? Arrogant, but true.

Richie Designs said...

greg p freaks me out, people that good looking are a freak of nature I don't trust him.

I felt so sorry for Peeler, lord knows I did some horribly embarrasing things the weeks/months following my split from my husband. You really become out of your ever-loving-mind-crazy.

Anonymous said...

Plitt needs to put down the hair gel and walk away. The wet look is not cool, dude.

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