Tuesday, November 18, 2008

In the grand tradition of the Real Housewives of Atlanta,

I'd like to announce the creation of my new charity, the Jeff Lewis Million Dollar Hugs Foundation.

As you may have seen on the front page of Yahoo, our very own Jeff Lewis of Bravo's Flipping Out is suffering deeply in the current recession.

It broke my heart to hear that Jeff, along with Zoila and all of the animals, are living in a 700 square foot house. Soon, he will be forced to take on remodeling projects in order to make ends meet. I cannot stand by and watch this happen. My hope is that I can raise enough money to move Jeff out of this squalor and into a 2 million dollar home in a trendy area (plus a $650k renovation budget and $10,000 for take-out meals).

In order to raise the funds, I am planning a a JLMDH luncheon, where invitees (only ballers, no riff-raff) will be asked to wear Lacoste in support of Jeff. A JLMDH live auction, which I hope to have sponsored by Starbucks, is also in the works. Please contact me if you'd like to volunteer or be on the guest list (subject to a background check) for either event.

In the meantime, I would like to personally call on Ryan Brown and Lori Lassner to open their homes and hearts to Jeff and his staff during this time of need.

In the comments section, please feel free to pledge your generous support and/or give Jeff your well wishes. Thank you so much.


Anonymous said...

What are you auctioning off?

I would bid on getting to spend an entire day with Jeff Lewis without his toupee.

SGM said...

omg, I can't stop laughing. I was just thinking of auctioning off his used latte cups or a day of cleaning with Zoila.

You think big, anon. I like that!

Natalie said...

Jeff, my love, I've got two words:

Target line.

Okay, two more:

Do it.


A line of Zoila cleaning products then? Green of course...Ms. Zoila's pet urine odor remover. I like it.

Jesse said...

Bravo is "expected to bring back" the show?! As in there is a chance they don't?

Please tell me that I won't need to donate a significant portion of my weekends to door-to-door signature collection for the "Keep Flipping Out On the Air" petition.

Amanda said...

I would like to submit my application as a volunteer. I am good at taking orders (and at talking back when spoken down to. I can serve with the best of them. Best of all, I know how to keep things on the downlow when I find out some information that is not intended for the public.

Paloma said...

My husband and I would gladly take Jeff and Zoila in! They could do Flipping Out: Houston Style and it might work nicely since our real estate is much less expensive than real estate in L.A. As someone who works in the RE industry, I feel his pain.

Seriously, though...they'd better bring back this show!

PoshProvocateur said...

He's welcome to come and crash at my crib.

mamacita said...

And if Jeff goes under, what happens to the makers of Restylane? Oh God, the horrors never stop!

700 square feet for two people? Breaking my heart. Here I am, being selfish with my 900 square feet and four people.

Jen said...

Not my Jeffy!

I would definitely bid on spending a day with him and Jenny, as long as during that day they totally fell in friend love with me and thus we spent every day after that together, without me having to bid on the days. Can we work something like that out?

If not, my second bid would be for a 10 minute full body hug with Jeff.

Brittany said...

This is horrible! Poor Jeff...

And Natalie is insanely on the money...a Target line would so make my life. Jeff Lewis pillows, blankets, THROW RUGS! My mind is abuzz with the possibilities...

Anonymous said...

Is Jeff creative enough to design a line? He's more a "move that here, put that there" kind of designer. I can't picture him conceiving and making products from scratch, like a Thomas O'Brien.