Tuesday, March 25, 2008

The Hills: Who knew?


Who knew that Lauren was a hop-on-the-back-of-a-vespa-with-a-
stranger-in-the-freezing-rain-with-your-borrowed-expensive-ball
-gown-bunched-up-in-your-lap kind of girl? On one hand, I thought "you're going to ruin your (second) beautiful gown, dumbass!" but on the other hand I thought "way to be young and adventurous, Lauren!" Especially considering the fact that she was not romantically interested in Mr. Vespa--did you see how she was trying to avoid any sort of face-closeness when he dropped her off?

[in French accent] "Lauren! Wait! Oh. Um, bye."

I tell you, there was a lot to like about Lauren on the new episode of The Hills last night. For example, she hemmed her fancy Ferretti gown in order to wear it to a dressy club (where t-shirts and flannel are apparently considered dressy. Oh God, I sound like my mother). If it would have been me, I would have zipped out to the nearest Parisian boutique and bought something off the rack. But not millionaire tv star Lauren; she just whips out the ol' needle and thread. Also, her tears over ruining said ball gown--so sweet. If Heidi would have been in the same situation and cameras weren't rolling, she would have called down to the concierge and screamed "this is Heidi Montag and I need a new fucking ball gown in 10 fucking minutes or heads are going to fucking ROLL, Pierre!" Then she would have slammed the phone down and gone back to looking at her boobs in the mirror.


Which brings us to Heidi . . . . boo freakin' hoo is about all I have to say. It was nice to see her abuse Spencer last night, but it seemed very contrived, just like everything else they do together. If she really didn't want to see him, he wouldn't have been invited out to dinner with her parents (how awkward was that, btw); he would have been in a hotel waiting for the next flight out. I might have applauded Heidi for a move like that, but she's obviously taken the mega-douche back and that can never be applauded.

One last thing: Whitney Port is so beautiful and chic! Lauren's cute, but next to the glowing Whitney, she looked too tan and even a bit swarthy. Ooh, also loved the Paris scenery as well as the Frenchie music (my favorite song, which was also in the finale of Sex and the City, can be found here).

Did you watch? What did you think?

P.S. My recap of this show will not be a regular thing; it will appear only at my whim because I don't want be committed to re-living the Heidi and Spencer fakery every week.

10 comments:

Habitually Chic said...

I missed the beginning but I loved them being in Paris. Oh la la! I could have done without Heidi and Spencer though. I wish they would get their own show so they can stop ruining The Hills for me. I thought Whitney looked so beautiful at the Ball but Lauren did too. I couldn't get over how pretty her hair looked everyday in rainy Paris. Biatch! I also thought the Frenchy was cute! If he wants to come to NYC, I'll hop on the back of his Vespa in a ballgown anyday!

Andrea B. said...

i love the fakery.
i love it all!

i do, however, hate vespas! lambrettas rule!

Paige said...

i love that song too and crack up at the very thought of french rap. also- did you know frenchie is MARRIED!!!!! total mtv casting call on that one.

Sarah's Fab Day said...

I just watched it and made a few comments myself. I heart Whitney too, she's great, and your Heidi insight so true. I laughed my head off with that seriously you are too funny! Love it.

Paloma said...

I agree with Habitually Chic about Lauren's hair always being perfect! I also loved the Paris scenery and also noticed that they played the same song from when Carrie was in Paris on SATC.

Does anyone else think Heidi had her lips done? She looks so ridiculous! Spencer is a douchebag deluxe. Did you see how he laughed when Heidi said she wanted her old life back?

Pink Wallpaper said...

i have to say as a big fan of the show, i felt like last night seemed mega scripted. but i still enjoy watching it...minus how painful it is to watch heidi and her lip injections....

Hannah said...

oh my god Heidi's lips DO NOT MOVE. the girl is cute but she needs to back away from the injections. Also, although I admired Lauren's craftiness with the dress it a) didn't look cute short and b)caused her to be both overdressed and reckless for no reason. tsk tsk.

Michelle said...

So, that's it? Just one episode in Paris? Bummer.
God, Heidi looked especially plasicine, didn't she? Those over-glossed, totally plumped up, non-moving lips had me mesmerized... And not in a good way.

I am Trish Marie said...

I do so love The Hills, but I am tiring of Speidi. They bore me. And there is something really wrong with her face. I can't figure it out, but it just is not what it used to be. And it was so much better before. Plus. I really can't get over how much Spencer looks like Harry from Harry and the Hendersons. It's creepy.

Miss Merry Sunshine said...

Heidi needs to eat some chicken...that bitch is way too bobble-headed. Spencer's "beard" makes him look like a rapist. I thought it was just hilarious how the whole "Paris trip" was actually one week, lol. I thought she was going for a month or something! How funny was Whitney...it only took him 2 days to get a new gf, wow! I don't think she actually likes Lauren, that was borderline mean.