Quote of the week comes from Ally, talking about Jill's ill-behaved dog, Ginger. Guess what? I can't say that I blame her. If you didn't see Ginger straining her tongue to lick inside Jill's nostril for what seemed to be at least 10 seconds, well then let me give you the honor:
And Jill's comments--something along the lines of "we can't let them know that you do this"--makes me think that this is not the first time this has happened. Are boogers protein? Because the dog trainer specifically said that you shouldn't be feeding her so much protein, Jill. Weren't you listening?
Sorry, in addition to grossing all of you out, I'm getting ahead of myself. I was up last night with a sick kid and now I'm not feeling so hot myself, so this Real Housewives of NYC recap will be short and sweet.
1. Ramoner. Tank top with buckles + mini-skirt + high heeled boots = hooker. Ramoner, Avery's friends are not your friends. I know that you're trying to be the cool mom and all, but you're definitely treading into Dina Lohan territory, and I don't think you want a little Lindsay on your hands. Do I need to sit you down in front of some Dr. Phil so that you can learn that the goal is not to be your daughter's best friend but her parent?
What's the name of your family business again? I can't remember. You should really push it more.
Nice to see Avery loosen up a bit in this episode. I think she's darling. Habitually Chic mentioned that she'd be up for adopting Avery, and I would totally support that. The courts might too after seeing this episode. Also, and I can't believe I'm admitting this, but I found Mario somewhat attractive in this episode. Help me.
2. Bethenny. TOO MUCH BETHENNY on this show. She talks and talks and talks like she is the only person in the world who has ever had a break-up. Shut up, already! What a fabulous body she has though. Holy smokes. Are those implants? I'd have to vote yes, simply because no one that skinny has boobs that big. One more thing--Bethenny's face is driving me nuts. The freakish shape of her jaw just distracts me, as does the never ending crazy jibber-jabbering.
3. Jill. Already covered you. If you get that nostril-licking dog under control (or at least away from the cameras), I just might start to like you.
4. Alex. I know we're all thinking this: how much did Simon spend on the birthday party? And how on earth did he convince all of those people to come? Muy interesante that Alex's party was on a boat, thrown by a man named Simon who gave her some expensive jewelry. Gosh, why does that sound so familiar?
5. Countess. I know I've said it before, but your children are gorgeous. Bratty? Yes, but still gorgeous. Thought Noel's breakdancing was pretty cute. I wonder what his teacher Cyclone thinks about teaching rich white kids how to breakdance. Cyclone, are you out there? SGM wants an interview.
Please fill in the gaps for me, my dears.
Real Housewives of New York City